Familiar Roads
Written by Wanda Rodriguez
Written on May 7, 2025
Published on May 8, 2025
Do you ever find yourself traveling down a familiar road, one you may have driven on hundreds of times over the years? I’m not talking about the ones you drive almost daily, that you can practically navigate blindfolded or on auto pilot. I’m referring to the roads that you may have grown up traveling on, whether as a passenger (as a child perhaps), or as a driver. The terrain has changed but some aspects of it seem to have gone untouched by time. Driving along these familiar byways stirs all sorts of memories and emotions.
I had the good fortune of just such an experience this past weekend. My dad was from a rural area about an hour from where I grew up. We made the drive countless times over the years to visit family, to visit graves, to attend weddings (or funerals), to play on the shore along the river’s edge (shout out to Colonial Beach!), to eat at our favorite restaurant on the water (shout out to Wilkerson’s!), to go to work during the college summers when I interned for the government (shout out to NSWC!), etc. I knew the road and the routes very well. Since reaching adulthood, I have almost always been the driver. Naturally, you notice things when you are the driver but you also have a duty to watch the road which limits your ability to put your head on a swivel and really take it all in. During my trip this weekend I found myself in the passenger seat and I loved it! My mind was flooded with so many things that I am finding it hard to put into words, but I will give it a try.
Most of this drive took place on a long, unremarkable, country road. With fresh eyes and freedom to drink in the scenery, I found myself looking for usual landmarks, the same ones I identified as a child that told me we were getting close to Pop-Pop’s house. The cool thing is that most of them were still there, like the wooden structures that held promise of fresh produce for purchase (though, according to my memory, the stands were almost always empty), the life sized horse statue that sits high on a stand at the entrance to someone’s home and stable (and the vivid memory of the owner’s covering the stature with a blanket during the cold months). Still there are the small, old sections of town where the speed limit quickly drops to 35 and where the buildings seem to be frozen in time, the country church where my parents, and other family members, are buried, the three sections of metal railing along the road that signal my brain to be alert because my grandfather’s (Pop-Pop’s) house is coming up on my immediate left, etc.
Likewise, there are markers I look for that I know have been gone for many years. This fact does not stop my eyes from heading squarely to where that marker had once been nor does it stop my brain from ending up lost in thought. A clear example of this is the Stuckey’s Country Store (I am not sure if they are still around) where we would stop when I was as a child (Every time! Without fail! Highlight of the trip!) to get a Pecan Log. My mom was crazy about pecan logs, especially the ones from Stuckey’s! Fun fact, until passing, I continued to get her pecan logs whenever I came across one at a store (assuming, of course, that it passed the squeeze test! It had to be semi-soft and not hard as a rock!! Pro-tip - don’t buy the hard ones! Never buy the hard ones!). I recently found a perfect one at a store and sent a picture of it to my brother (shared memories are the best!). No, if you are wondering, I did not buy it. It is more of a special memory than something I would choose for myself. Somehow eating one with my mom just made it taste that much better, if that makes any sense.
Some of the things have drastically changed over the years as well. Progress has brought about wider roads, a superstore (Wally World), more grocery stores and cluster homes where there had once been only farmland, pigs and horses among the peppering of homesteads. Even with the changes, my mind swelled with memories and connections, forever etched inside, to this familiar bit of roadway. Then the strangest thing happened, we kept going. We drove past the point of my recall (maybe we drove it as a child but if so, not often enough to make a memory). We continued for another hour and, though the overall scenery was similar to what we had just driven through (with the addition of water), there were no memories that stirred. It felt familiar and yet unknown at the same time.
Now my memory bank was on high alert, adding new bits of new information to this well-traveled road from my past. It was actively merging old memories with the new ones as we trekked on until the road ended at the water’s edge, the bay. It was beautiful in its breathtaking simplicity. It was comfortable, peaceful, relaxing, familiar and yet completely unknown to me. I felt immediately at home. For the first time since Dave’s passing, I thought to myself, this is some place that I could see myself living. I was engulfed by the feelings of peace as I drank in the breeze, the birds, the sounds, the smells and the splendor of it all. Traveling down this comfortable road will never be the same, even if this is the only time I make it all the way to the end. The journey will forever be enhanced by new memories and the knowledge of what lies ahead if I were to just keep on driving a little further.
Life is like this in some ways. Life is a unique journey for each of us with many twists, turns and intersections. Sometimes we are required to make decisions on our journey about which way to go and other times we find ourselves comfortably nestled into the passenger seat. Either way, everything we do, see or experience influences that journey, sometimes to the point that life becomes comfortably familiar, not unlike my well-traveled road. You might think to yourself, Yeah. I know this place in life very well. It used to be this or that and that’s cool. It just suits me. You may think that you have a full picture of your life and of the area, until you don’t. One day you decide to keep driving past the familiar, into the new, unknown territory to see what life has to offer. You take it all in and assess. This new bit of road might be like mine, where it feels warm and inviting. Or, this new section of travel might feel unstable or unsafe to you. The experience could easily fall somewhere in between. The point is that life goes on and so go our own journeys. The roads you take, though familiar, may be different or enhanced beyond expectations as you continue onward. This is not necessarily a bad thing. We all know that change can be hard but change is happening around us, everyday, whether we see it and embrace it or not.
Over time, the people who travel in the car with you along these familiar roads may change but they do not replace those who traveled with you before. There’s always room for one more in the car of life (immediately my mind went to the game of LIFE, and the little cars with six holes for the peg people. IYKYK). I’m referring to people to share experiences with and make memories with. People who join you on your journey down life’s highways. Life was not meant to stay the same forever. I feel like we are always growing, learning, changing, adapting and influencing in some way. Don’t be afraid to take that comfortable road past the point of familiarity and see what awaits. It’s okay to be the passenger sometimes and to take it all in but it’s also okay to take the wheel and chart a new course. Life is about the familiar merging with the unfamiliar, to increase knowledge and understanding as you continue moving ever forward on your journey of life. Change can lead to wonderful, beautiful, eye opening, growth experiences. Don’t be afraid to travel past the known roads.
As always, thank you for joining me on my journey through life, growth and discovery.
Several songs came to mind as I wrote this piece:
Blue Sky, By The Allman Brothers Band
Walk along the river, sweet lullaby
They just keep on flowin', they don't worry 'bout where it's goin', no, no
Don't fly, mister blue bird, I'm just walkin' down the road
Early morning sunshine, tell me all I need to know
You're my blue sky, you're my sunny day
Lord, you know it makes me high
When you turn your love my way
Turn your love my way, yeah
Good old Sunday mornin', bells are ringin' everywhere
Goin' to Carolina, it won't be long and I'll be there
You're my blue sky, you're my sunny day
Lord, you know it makes me high
When you turn your love my way
Turn your love my way, yeah, yeah
Down by the Bay, Author unknown
Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a bear
Combing his hair?"
Down by the bay.
Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a bee
With a sunburned knee?"
Down by the bay.
Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a moose
Kissing a goose?"
Down by the bay.
Down by the bay
Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a whale
With a polka dot tail?"
Down by the bay.
Country Roads, By John Denver
Almost heaven, West Virginia
Blue ridge mountains, Shenandoah river
Life is old there, older than the trees
Younger than the mountains, blowing like a breeze
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain mamma
Take me home, country roads
All my memories, gather round her
Miner's lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky
Misty taste of moonshine, teardrop in my eye
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain mamma
Take me home, country roads
I hear her voice in the morning hour she calls me
Radio reminds me of my home far away
Driving down the road I get a feeling
That I should have been home yesterday, yesterday
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain mamma
Take me home, country roads
Country roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain mamma
Take me home, country roads
Take me home, down country roads
Take me home, down country roads
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